“And hast borne, and hast patience, and for my name's sake hast laboured, and hast not fainted. Nevertheless I have somewhat against thee, because thou hast left thy first love. Remember therefore from whence thou art fallen, and repent, and do the first works; or else I will come unto thee quickly, and will remove thy candlestick out of his place, except thou repent.”
It has been quite a while since my last post that wasn’t a hymn or something…and to be honest I have felt ZERO motivation to write a post of late. Well, I was thinking about my excitement for God’s Word and truth…my first love…and how that has been diminished in the past few months. Why? I have asked myself that question and of course the answer rises directly to the top. The problem is that there is no…absolutely no… good excuse for it.
What is my heart fixed upon?
What does it love?
What does it desire?
Is there one thing that I desire of the LORD?
Is that what I seek after?
Do I truly delight in my LORD because He is delightful?
Do I love the Lord Jesus Christ because He is Altogether Lovely?
How did I let my deceitful heart lose its passion for Him?
Why has my zeal diminished?
Shall I not receive good at the hand of the LORD and not evil also?
Alright…I have my stethoscope (My Bible) and I am listening to my heart…
mmm.. there’s a problem. Here’s what it sounded like at the beginning of this year..
THUMP.THUMP.THUMP.THUMP.THUMP.THUMP.THUTHUTHUMP! : )
Why has the rate decreased? Time to restore my romance!
Time to chase after my LORD as in the beginning! He has given me so much! He allowed me to have a conscience at a young age, being baptized at 7 years old…what have I done to prove my love and zeal for Him?! Have I rendered Him my reasonable best these past few months? Or have I let the billows roll over me and choke me? Have I had faith or started to sink? Did I even, like Peter, call out Lord! Save me or I sink?! or did I allow my soul to drown?
Oh LORD! Whatever my lot though hast taught me to say it is well with my soul! Be still my soul thy God will undertake to guide the future, as He has the past. Thy hope, thy confidence let NOTHING shake! Chasten my soul ‘til I shall be in perfect harmony with Thee!
I cry: LORD, please come in and sup once more with me…I shall not leave go of you until you do!! I will aggressively seek You with my whole heart, fervently!
He truly is my Beloved! My Beloved is mine and I am His! Praise His beautiful, wonderful, majestic, sweet name!
I love you LORD!